All set to..."Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation."

I just got accepted to Epic Summer Project: Japan! This feeling has gotten me real excited! I have no doubt that God will use me in my best ability to "Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation." (Mark 16:15). Ahhhh.... Praise God for His goodness, His love, and His Son Jesus. Pray as God prepares me on the trip and show the Japanese how to inherit the Kingdom of God through me. And to provide sufficient funding for me to go overseas to Japan. This is SUPERRRR awesome! WAHHH!

All set... to "Go"

My parents gave me the "Go" to Epic Summer Project in Japan. Now all I need wait patiently for the Lord. $5800 dollars seems very intimidating, but, like my friend said, "God is bigger than that." I'm sure that he will provide the financial support to take me to Japan. If not, then God may not be calling me to Japan. Please pray that I will have enough financial needs to get to Japan. This is a really big step I am taking and knowing I need to raise $5800 scares me. Oh boy oh boy...

Anxious as what's to happen, but also excited at the thought of me sharing the Gospel in Japan! Just a warm feeling inside me.

I have a major test tomorrow that I cannot afford to fail, so I am going to end it now.

ワンピース (One Piece)

Sigh...If only I was passionate about God than I am with One Piece... I'm always reading about the characters, reading articles on the events in One Piece, and finding out new things in the One Piece world. I get so excited! I even debate against other people why One Piece is so great! One Piece is so awesome!
But when if I used that passion for God? I would read the Bible everyday, read some Christian books, and learn something new in the Bible! I would tell other people why Christ is so good and so much better than anything in the world! But...that has yet to happen.

I went to Austin Stone Feb 20th, 2011. Pastor Halim talked about "Why evangelize if God is sovereign?" This has been on my mind a lot. I do keep it to myself a lot sometimes, even to people I truly care about that don't know Jesus. Halim said that it was like a girl who's been going out with this boy for several years. And on a beautiful night, the boy proposes to her and asks her to marry him. She says yes and gets excited. This unexplainable joy runs through her and she can't wait to tell everyone. She gets her phone, calls her best friends and then suddenly the boy grabs her phone and says, "Hey, lets just keep it a secret between you and me. Don't let anyone know." That joy was cut short and was not experienced to its full extent.
Never thought of that before. When I accepted Christ, I did not tell ANYONE. I waited for people to ask me. Dah. No wonder I was not super happy at the moment. Read Mark 1:40-45.

Anyways, about today...
It seems that I still not have not learned my lesson on procrastination... IT'S BAD! RESULTS ARE BAD!
Here are things that hinder my academics: distractions, laziness, and apathy.

Today, I took my Japanese Oral exam. Totally blanked out... because I studied the night before and got 5 hours of sleep. The results were clear: I did horrible.

I want to tell myself not to do it again, but I know I am not perfect. Gotta ask God to help me out here.

My cloudy head

I need to place God in front of me, to show that He is much better than anything else, and that anything else is just a temporary earthly desire. He is far more worth than anything.

Dang it, Satan is so witty. tempts me a lot at the most random times.

My head needs to be cleared and be filled up with God's presence. With some prayer, He'll remind me that he is still with me.

Chris Tomlin's "Our God is Greater" also lifts me up and praise Jesus for his victory over sin.

And if our God is for us
then who can ever stop us
And if our God is with us
then what can stand against!!

Remember to place God first in EVERYTHING! And Remember that when you see something that looks REAL GOOD or GREAT, remind yourself that "Our God is Greater".

Global Game Cram

I meant to post this 2 weeks ago

Jan 28th, 2011 - Jan 30th, 2011
Global Game Jam was interesting in a sense. It was not fun that I was sick and had to spend long hours trying to finish a game. It didn't help that I was inexperienced at making games. But, making a game from scratch was a good feeling. We discussed, talked about what game to make, ended up making an inconsistent game. We had 3 designers (including myself) make 3 different levels that were totally different. At the end, combined it and called it a game. I really enjoyed the artists' works (except one, no offense). But yeah it was a really good experience on how designers/programmers have to go through to make a game. takes a LOAD of time. like A LOT!

On that same weekend though. My bike got stolen that day. Major depression. I was getting very sick too. Back hurting, getting colds, feeling like crap. That day was also very cold and I only brought one layer of jacket. 4 hours into GGJ, I didn't get anything to eat. Just cookies, crackers, candy, and granola bars. I didn't drive that time, so I didn't go out and get dinner. Not having a car was also a problem! 2 AM saturday,
I was feeling like crap, depressed about a bike, cold, and hungry and had no ride home. I felt like giving up on this game thing and just bailing out.

Even when I was about to give up, I was able to find a ride home at 2:30 AM. once I got home, I was at the bike rack unlocking my unused chain bike lock. Jessica, my neighbor happened to walk by and we talked about what had happened to my bike. She then comforted me with caring words and me feel a lot better. I was able to eat some food at home, and stay warmer. I realize God made these struggles for me to realize that I need to depend on Him more. I was in one of my lowest points and did not not He was working in me even when I didn't ask. Wow...He is so good. Those were some essential sufferings I had to go through to get closer with Him.

Yeah, then we finished the game. GLOBAL GAME CRAM! 48 hours is actually not enough time to finish an awesome game, so u need to plan to make a small, yet fun game that will be completed in due time.

Okay I need to tell you a time when we presented our projects. About 8 teams made games and presented their games. Some were pretty awesome and amazing. There was one that was unfinished because they had no experience with XNA. After showing their unfinished game, they showed their game idea. It was basically very ambitious project and would have required a lot more than 48 hours to complete. I could totally understand why they didn't finish now. After they presented it was our turn (Team GameSalad)!

Every team had to have a team name, but no one really thought about it to begin with. Jonathan from out team was actually a tool designer for GameSalad and works for GameSalad, so he presented for us. So what he said was "Ummm, I guess we are Team GameSalad." Then a member from the unfinished game team hollered an unnecessary comment, "Don't you mean team 'FruitSalad'". *snicker snicker* Jonathan could not take his insult from his company, so he replied, "No, we're the team that finished our game."

OOOOoooOOOOOOO!!!! BURN!!! ~Everyone who attended the presentations.

that was a pretty sick burn and it was awesome. That guy basically shut up afterwards. My initial reaction was, YEAH TAKE THAT! but then i realize how harsh that could have hurt the unfinished team. insults firing back and forth. getting revenge on each other. it just never ends! eye for an eye and the whole world becomes blind! It reminds me of what I do sometimes. I like to get back at people when they did me wrong. when people make some mean comments at me, even if it was a joke, i like to "return the favor".

I would like to see myself stop the revenge thingy sometime. And I also would like to see myself be more thankful. And also be more forgiving. <----These are just for myself to note

Stolen Bike

My Bike got stolen between 12-1 pm today.
After lunch, I just walk down and try to find my bike. Then, tried to look for it. Confused, I checked again...no luck. My bike had just been stolen. I just stood there, wondering what and how I ever let it get stolen between 1 hour. I was really angry and upset. My back had started to hurt as well and that didn't help my day at all. 5 whole minutes: just standing there and being depressed a little. I knew I would regret using that pink flimsy lock one day. Today was the day.

I also noticed a small bike parked next to the area where my bike had been stolen. It was not locked and vulnerable. Thoughts ran through my head. I'm pretty sure the bike stealer came to this area, parked his bike, checked out which bikes were nice, clipped my flimsy lock, and biked his away from that area. If I took his (or her) bike, it'd be like an exchange, right? Or confiscate it to see if he was looking for it. Such bad thoughts.

"Eye for an eye and the whole world becomes blind" -Gandhi

If I took his bike, I would have been no different from him. I had to go to class soon anyways, so I didn't have time to think about it too much anyways.

I had 8 minutes to go one corner of the campus from the other corner. I thought of running because I had a quiz at the beginning of Japanese class. Halfway through, I just walked. Not worth it. My back was hurting, and I wouldn't have anytime to write anything down once I got there. That's going to be my drop I guess.

During class, all I could think about was my bike. So depressed and angry. I think those are like the stages of mourning, right? My bike is gone forever.

AGHH!!! is it okay to be angry? cuz i am really frickin angry... sigh...depressed too...because my bike is gone and that I will have to be walking from now on...

took the bus home just now, cuz no bike, and back hurts.

I think God is teaching me to be more careful of my belongings now. Oh boy did I learn the hard way. Thank you for that valuable lesson in life.

I'm off to GGJ now. see you Sunday.

48 hour marathon starts tomorrow

I guess I never told you what to pray for me about at GGJ did I?

Pray for enough energy to get me through this event. This is my first time ever to GGJ and I have no idea what to expect. So lots of prayer for energy.

Pray for good relations with the people I will meet at the event. This is something I'm interested in - video games! But I want to develop some relationships with the whoever I will work with and just get to know who they are like. Currently, I see them as gamers who love games. I'm pretty sure they are more than just that. Maybe I will share with them what Jesus has done in my life.

Also, today I went to EGaDS. I basically joined this for my own benefit. But ever since I went to Epic Anthology Jan. 14, 2011, I feel like I should be more missional. I joined for experience/networking with video games AND to develop relationships with the members. I went to the meeting, and I just question myself, "What I am doing here? I'm not like them." Stuff like that. I was basically surrounded by Non-Christians and looking at them with disgust. I realize how wrong my thoughts were. It shows that my heart has not softened fully like Christ's. Please pray for a softened heart for EGaDS members...scratch that, EVERYONE! It'll be a hard process, but if our God is with, then what can ever stop us? Gotta remind myself, "When man works, man works. But when man prays, God works."

GGJ

Going to Global Game Jam on Friday through Saturday. This is what one of my friends from EGaDS (Electronic Game Developers Society) told me. Hopefully he will not sue me for quoting him as I will put him as anonymous to protect him.
So I asked him, "I have no experience. No one can use me...right?"

"Yeah, we had someone on our team last year with very little technical experience. He helped out with design, testing, and made our tutorial video.

Even if you just watch the coders or artists, you can learn a lot or point things out that they might have missed. You might not be able to contribute as much as some more experienced participants, but experience has to start somewhere.

GGJ's one of the fastest ways to get it."

oo words of wisdom. I was definitely prioritizing this over the video shoot with Twisted Pixel. but experience is important. GAIN EXP!

My classes are going smoothly so far. just need to do them early and not too much Halo. Going to try to commit to going to EGaDS and Epic. ESPECIALLY Epic. and do well in school. and read the Bible.

Marco got me a moleskin. it's my first one ever! I'm excited! But i dont exactly know what to do with it. write my thoughts I guess.

Alright, just pray that ill get some sleep during GGJ this weekend! Thank youuu!

にほんごがだいすきです！

That translates to "I love Japanese!"

Anyways, I need to talk about my winter break. Actually there is nothing to talk about my winter break. It's just play LoL all the time. League of Legends basically controlled my life. I had to play it. Even when I wanted to be productive, it was sitting there waiting for me to be played. "Playyyyy meeee Lorennn!" I had nothing else better to do, so I was like, "Sure, I could use some more Wins to get IP to get that awesome hero I always wanted." So I would play and play and play. Non-stop. There's this leaver penalty in the game too. If you left a game, then you get penalized and everyone was able to see "LEAVER" which almost everyone in LoL dislikes. So whenever my parents called, or my sisters talked to me, I would not be able to talk to them because I was too focused on the game. and If I left the computer, I would let my team down. Once I was in a game, I could not leave the computer and glued myself to LoL. It was pretty bad, I must admit.

I really think computer games are definitely go hand-in-hand with drugs. At least for people who have a long history of gaming in the past (like me). It's present, right next to you. You don't want to because it's bad, but u do it anyways. That's something I experienced in the winter break.

One thing I did find out though, was when I stopped fully from playing games, uninstalled LoL. I seriously had this feeling of being...free. I was free from the addictiveness of the game. I could do more productive things that make my parents happy. I could help them out, wash the dishes, learn to cook, walk my dog. There are so many other things I'd rather do than play LoL!

There's nothing to gain in LoL (except building a strong community). Get new heroes, get runes, get more masteries, more things! What happens in the end though? nothing! We keep playing, receiving the satisfactions of winning for a short while, and continue to find that feeling again. it's an endless sad cycle gamers love to do.

It reminded me of how minuscule the earthly things are compared to what God has planned for us. We sinful humans tend to strive fame, success, love, power, etc. But there's nothing else to gain after these achievements! God gives us Himself, His Kingdom, and eternal life. That is more worth it than anything in the universe! Look up to Him and make Him the prize!

Don't get the wrong idea - games are fun. I love video games. But there are times when video games become our god. As gamers, our lives revolve around it and once it's taken away, we become in despair. Tis' sad. Just a reminder that God is the center of our lives and we must not place anything else other than Him.

oh yeah! I also read Counterfeit Gods by Tim Keller this break. Learned about idolization of the earthly things and how it can lead us to despair. God is the answer! still reading it.

Also Pray for my semester. retaking two classes. Need extra good grades. hopefully someone will come across this blog and comment.

I heard everyone uses Tumblr. WELL I AINT ONE OF EM! :P

Good night, Austin TX